Living my life in a new year (thoughts after Hawaii)

I don't know about you, but life has a way of knocking me down, adding twists, giving me a mile high adrenaline rush, and surprising me at many turns. As soon as I think I found a status quo, I'm reminded there is nothing that last forever. This can be a great thing, or it can be a devastating thing, and how I handle each moment matters—a lot... to me, and to those around me (especially those closest to me). Life can leave me in a fog, and then bring moments of crisp clarity. They say follow your heart, but I've learned mine isn't worth trusting and following anything but truth is a waste of my short time on this earth. I love life. I LOVE life! With something as large and powerful as life, full of potential, life is exciting. But life is broken. We live in a broken world full of broken people, all searching for meaning and relevance whether we admit it or not; it's under the surface of each of us. I can't control life, and the more I try, the more irritated and angry I can become. Life is not about me, it's much larger... so much larger.

I see pain. I feel pain. I see anger, and I sometimes am anger. I see hurt and I feel hurt. I see joy, and am blessed at times to feel it's touch in my life as well. I witness miracles, and can see miraculous moments in my life too. I see grace, and experience grace. I wonder at God's creation and I feel small, and then as easily forget about it's vastness and think I am the biggest thing on the planet. I fight my "ego" and false identity constantly. My "ego" wants to define me and lock me in a box. It wants me to see myself as my job, as my personality, as my talents, as my faults and as my ideas. But I am none of these things. That is not my identity. I may think a certain way today and hold a distinct vocation today, but that is not WHO I am. We are all larger than all these things, and in physical form our lives last only but the amount of a vapor floating from a candle.

So you see, how I live these moments in life is important; important for my children and those my life touches—even those I don't know my life is touching...

I want to find truth, live truth, and offer love & compassion. I only have one life and I want to spend it delighting in God & reflecting His light. His light is good and is a force to fight the pain, the anger, & pride I experience in life and see in the world.

I've posted a list below to remind myself to live with intention, to play hard, and remember to laugh each day. I thought you might find it at least entertaining if not helpful. I wish you well, and thank each of you for being here.

much love,
-TJ

Similar thoughts and inspiration from an older blog post years ago...
We only get once chance in life; one go around. Sometimes I think it’d be neat to either have 1000 years to get it right, where I’d look 20 years old for about 800 of those years with all the vigor, idealism, love and passion that comes with it, or at around 60 years, our bodies would kinda do a “life warp” where we’d get to keep all the experience of the first go around but our bodies return to that of a 19 year old again, and we get a second chance to make different choices and live life in a totally different way if we wished. Nevertheless, for all the pros and cons of something like that actually happening, there have been some phrases that have stood out to me, being the creative that I am (and yes, I’m using “creative” as a noun here) and so I thought I’d share these in hopes they might inspire you to live for today. Remember, you only get one chance. Make it good. Live with intention. I’m saying enjoy life; don’t wait for great moments, create good moments, and fight the momentum of getting into a rut and just “being there” and living a mediocre life. So with that said, take a look at his list by Mary Anne Radmacher. I hope you find it inspiring.

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live with intention.

walk to the edge.

listen hard.

practice wellness.

play with abandon.

laugh.

choose with no regret.

continue to learn.

appreciate your friends.

do what you love.

live as if this is all there is.

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My friends, I wish you well and the happiest of days. Thank you for being in my life. You make life so much more pleasant and exciting to go through, enriching my soul every step of the way. Thank you!

Comments

[Amy Raycroft]

Beautifully written (as always!!)

[Anne-Marie]

Love the photos of Hawaii and love the post. Except maybe for living "as if this is all there is." That wouldn't be much of a life. We need to bring the album back to you so the cover can be fixed. Will someone be in the studio Friday?